I could just kill a man.
A few weeks ago a friend of mine told the story of how when she was in college, they used to write “sup batches” on the white boards of each others’ doors instead of the female-dog-word. Since then, every time I see the word “Batch” I cannot help thinking it’s secret meaning is really that cuss word and my cussing habits have now consumed this word into their vocabulary.
Similarly related, as opposed to the habitual 4 letter words that begin with S and D, I’ve found myself in the new habit (along with batches) to repeatedly say the letters “SOB” in my head instead of actually saying what it stands for. I can’t tell if this is better or worse.
A friend of mine [who is in a caregiving position] attended a conference focusing on avoiding physical burn out while in care giving positions. While she was there she was texting me that she would soon teach me the ways against physical stressing-out [over our bottle of wine after the conference]. The best tip? Manually unclenching your cheeks. Yes, both of your cheeks: the areas that your body tenses up are in your lower jaws and your hip-pelvic region. While in stressful situations, remember to take a second for yourself and manually unclench. This habit will do wonders, ‘they’ say. Especially with the lower cheeks: if you can relax your muscles here, all other muscles in your body will follow, ‘they’ say.
After Jess explained the manually unclenching of the cheeks, we decided to read some of Tina Fey’s Bossypants out loud. (Haha, the next best thing after Style, Sex, and Substance? Not sure about that, but talk about hilarious). While reading a chapter about the insides of being an SNL writer, this is what we happened upon.
“During the dress rehearsal, Lorne gave us the note that he couldn’t understand Stallone in the sketch and we should ask him to enunciate more. I stood nervously outside the host’s dressing room with Scott Wainio. He had been there a year already, so I figured he’d know what to do. Scott’s experience level was evident when he looked at me and shrugged. “You tell him.”
My trademark obedience kicked in and I found myself knocking on the door and being ushered in. Judge Dredd himself was on the couch in an undershirt, smoking another cigar. He looked up at me. I muttered, “In the Rita sketch, you were a little hard to understand. Can you just enunciate a little more?” Stallone was unfazed. “Youcannunnastanme?” Youneeme nanaunciate maw? Okay.” He couldn’t have been more easygoing about it. My guess is that this was not the first time in his career he had been given that note. I went back outside and manually released my butt cheeks.” (Emphasis added.)
And then we knew ‘they’ were right.
Let us all pause right now to manually unclench. Thank you.
Long standing un-blogging best friend Randi is moving her prego self and hubby back to the general area this weekend. Can’t wait to finally see that baby belly and beautiful momma in MN in May.
Go check out Jen for more takes!